


Afraid

by le_paquet_fou



Series: Growing Pains [6]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, No Beta We Die Like Clones, im so sorry the angst is strong here, sweet little cadet rex and cody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:01:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29505189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/le_paquet_fou/pseuds/le_paquet_fou
Summary: Working with different batches was always horrible, but after a particularly bad week with another batch, Rex just needs Cody by his side.
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex
Series: Growing Pains [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2130072
Comments: 7
Kudos: 31
Collections: AOJAOP Universe





	Afraid

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt given to me on tumblr. Come yell at [@made-by-the-clone-wars](https://made-by-the-clone-wars.tumblr.com/) for more prompts/fic chats.

Rex wishes he could crawl in a hole and die a slow, painful death. That would be a mercy compared to the hell in his mind right now. All day for the past week, the new batch they’ve been working with have done nothing but torment him. Every comment they’ve made sticks in his mind, piled up with the rest that he’s either heard or told himself. He wishes he could forget them, but they just echo louder and louder in his head.

_“Aw, little mutie has a plan? How cute.”_

_“Ew, don’t touch me.”_

_“What the hell do you think you’re doing, you stupid mutant?”_

_“How’d something like you get here anyways? Don’t they have quality control?”_

_“Probably would’ve been better if they scrapped you at the start.”_

It’s too much. He opens the sleeping pod and stumbles out, fumbling around in the darkness until he finds his corner and falls down. He curls up small and takes deep, shuddering breaths to stop himself from crying. There’s no use for it, and it only strengthens the points they’ve made.

It’s not long before there’s shuffling and someone sits down next to him. He knows who it is without even looking up; there’s only one brother who bothers to look out for him.

“Hey Rex.”

“Hey Codes.” Stars, he sounds even more pathetic than he thought.

“Rough week, wasn’t it?”

“That’s the understatement of the century.”

“Yeah. Those guys were jackasses. I’m sorry you have to put up with shit like that all the time. It’s not fair.”

“It is what it is.”

“Doesn’t make it any better.”

“Never said that made it better.” There’s a lull, and Rex sighs. He still doesn’t fully understand why Cody made the effort to know and care about him. It’s not like it was easy, but he persisted. He _wanted_ to be his friend, his brother. And Rex can’t wrap his head around that.

“Why don’t you ever say anything back?”

“What?”

“You always just stand there and take it. If you fought back, that could make it better. You wouldn’t be going down without a fight.”

“You know I can’t. They’ll just spin it so that I’m the one who started it and then away I go. And as much as I want to fight back, I can’t. No matter what I do or think or say, I’ll be the one punished, and I’m terrified of what they’ll do to me.”

“Don’t let your fears dictate your life, Rex. Don’t you see how much you’re suffering? Don’t you see how miserable you are because you’re so afraid all the time? Wouldn’t it be better if you weren’t constantly scared of anything and everything?”

“Don’t let my fears dictate my life? Cody, the only reason I’m alive is _because_ I’m afraid! I’m scared of dying, Codes, and I _know_ they’ll kill me the first chance they get. I can’t give them a reason, true or otherwise, to throw me away like the broken product I am. Because that’s all they see when they look at me. That’s all _anyone_ sees when they look at me! They think I’m defective, disgusting, useless. They want to get rid of me. They want me dead!”

Tears are streaming down his face now, his breath hitching with sobs begging to be heard. He pulls at his hair, horrible and blond and a reminder that he will never be enough, and strands start to fall out of his fists. He wants to pull it out, pull it all out, get rid of the source of his suffering, but his hands are gently pried away and held in front of him.

“Rex. Rex, hey, look at me.” He looks up at Cody, his face blurred through the tears. His face is soft with worry. He brings one hand to Rex’s face, wiping away the tears. That only makes Rex cry harder, and he quickly grabs Cody and pulls him into a hug. He presses his face against his chest, hanging onto Cody for dear life as he cries silently.

“You don’t believe them, do you?” He doesn’t answer, which is an answer in and of itself. “Oh Rex… you’re not broken or defective. You’re not. You’re smart and quick on your feet, and you care so much for others even if you don’t let it show. All of that is amazing, and means more than some random mutation. I’m sorry so many people don’t see that, that they don’t see what I see in you. It’s not fair that they make you so afraid.”

“I wish I wasn’t,” he whispers. “I wish I could let go of my fears, mess up sometimes but know that it isn’t a death sentence. I wish I could just exist without being reminded that it’s a blessing I’m alive at all. I don’t want to be scared, Cody. I hate it, I hate it so much, but I don’t have a choice…” He trails off, tears welling in his eyes again. Cody hugs him tighter, resting his cheek on top of his head.

“I’m sorry. I’m a broken record, I know, but I really am. And I didn’t mean to make you so upset, I was… well to put it bluntly, I was being an idiot. I always forget how much of your life is a struggle to survive because of how far you’ve risen above it. I don’t ever mean to hurt you, and if I do then you absolutely deserve to yell at me like you did a few minutes ago. I’m really, _really_ sorry Rex.”

“I know you don’t mean it. I know you’ll always have my back. We fuck up sometimes, we’re human, despite what the Kaminoans think. But I know who you are, I know you only want to look out for me. I feel safe around you, I trust you, even if sometimes you mess up.”

“I- thank you for trusting me… it means a lot. And I promise I’ll do better. I want to give you a place where you don’t have to be afraid, and I’ll do whatever it takes to do that.”

“Just stay by my side. That’s more than enough.”

“That’s easy to do.” Rex smiles and curls up into Cody’s side. He could stay like this forever, wrapped up in Cody’s arms and enveloped in the friendly warmth of a brother. And after the hellish week he’s had, Cody was still there to be everything he needed and more. He couldn’t be luckier.


End file.
